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baronessekatI'm tired.
Physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually. Flat out exhausted.
I'm tired of scraping to get by. The current economy has me pinching pennies and I am still robbing Peter to pay Paul for basic bills. I just authorized an overdraft on my bank account to keep my gas from being shut off. And this is after my amazing sister helped me out by covering property taxes and a very high and past due electric bill.
My credit rating has plummeted because I have had to late pay a lot of bills the last few months. I got a raise at work but that goes into effect with my next paycheck.
I agreed ages ago to be fought for in our upcoming crown and reserved the hotel room. Now I have no idea how I am going to scrape up the funds for the room or gas (I can do one but the other will be tough).
I'm tired of having nightly panic attacks on how I am just going to get through, what will I do if the furnace breaks in the middle of winter, how will I cover a medical emergency for me or Grimmy? I'm tired of finding myself just shutting down and zoning for hours after work because I just can't anymore.
Additionally work is just killing my soul. I'm tired of working for a toxic abusive asshole who yells for no reason and forgets he tells you to do something, the gets upset when you do what he told you to do. I'm tired of having to field calls from upset customers because he won't let me handle the customers in a timely manner because HE needs some stupid and trivial thing taken care of (like push the button on the coffee maker in his office, or research where he can find socks in the EXACT shade of black that he wants). He's the one that made me Customer Service Manager on top of hispersonal verbal/emotional punching bag Admin Assistant.
I finally have given myself permission to start putting myself back on the market. Frankly, despite the financial issues I have, I would be willing to take a cut if the environment is better and the benefits are better. (currently no 401k, let along matching. 2 weeks of vacation with no additional no matter how long you are employed, health insurance coverage that is a joke and the premiums are outrageous, and I do not get reimbursed for mileage when I use my car to run his stupid errands that could be done by his wife or him off hours).
I cannot bring myself to ask for more help. I've been doing that too much and I do not want to get the reputation that other acquaintances of mine have of constantly asking for or needing assistance.
I just don't know. I will muddle through somehow.
Physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually. Flat out exhausted.
I'm tired of scraping to get by. The current economy has me pinching pennies and I am still robbing Peter to pay Paul for basic bills. I just authorized an overdraft on my bank account to keep my gas from being shut off. And this is after my amazing sister helped me out by covering property taxes and a very high and past due electric bill.
My credit rating has plummeted because I have had to late pay a lot of bills the last few months. I got a raise at work but that goes into effect with my next paycheck.
I agreed ages ago to be fought for in our upcoming crown and reserved the hotel room. Now I have no idea how I am going to scrape up the funds for the room or gas (I can do one but the other will be tough).
I'm tired of having nightly panic attacks on how I am just going to get through, what will I do if the furnace breaks in the middle of winter, how will I cover a medical emergency for me or Grimmy? I'm tired of finding myself just shutting down and zoning for hours after work because I just can't anymore.
Additionally work is just killing my soul. I'm tired of working for a toxic abusive asshole who yells for no reason and forgets he tells you to do something, the gets upset when you do what he told you to do. I'm tired of having to field calls from upset customers because he won't let me handle the customers in a timely manner because HE needs some stupid and trivial thing taken care of (like push the button on the coffee maker in his office, or research where he can find socks in the EXACT shade of black that he wants). He's the one that made me Customer Service Manager on top of his
I finally have given myself permission to start putting myself back on the market. Frankly, despite the financial issues I have, I would be willing to take a cut if the environment is better and the benefits are better. (currently no 401k, let along matching. 2 weeks of vacation with no additional no matter how long you are employed, health insurance coverage that is a joke and the premiums are outrageous, and I do not get reimbursed for mileage when I use my car to run his stupid errands that could be done by his wife or him off hours).
I cannot bring myself to ask for more help. I've been doing that too much and I do not want to get the reputation that other acquaintances of mine have of constantly asking for or needing assistance.
I just don't know. I will muddle through somehow.
