baronessekat | On Weaselmas

12 ½ years ago I was at my first household non-SCA function. It was Christmas time and I was surrounded by people I did not know except in briefest of passings or by name alone. I had been sitting in a corner, watching the interactions with people as the night had progressed but feeling very much the outsider.

I do not remember the time but I remember the great cry of joy that rose up when someone walked in the door. I remember the eyes of this person first. Bright vivid blue that were tempered with a combination of “I’m home” and “I’m tired” and “Who are all these freaks”. Someone, I think it was Haakon, maybe Danny, when asked who this girl was, said “It’s Dicea”.

I remember feeling a slight touch of envy at the reception this Dicea got from the people there and hoped to one day maybe feel a small amount of that welcoming feeling. I watched and observed as people found her a place to sit and handed her a drink.

Not too long afterwards I was shown where I would be sleeping that night. It so happened to be on the floor in Morguhn’s room. I remember Rowan asking if I minded if they bunked Dicea down with me. The best thing I ever did in my life was to say “Sure, no problem”.

I crawled into my blankets and had just settled in when she came to bed herself. She introduced herself and promptly fell asleep. At around 5:30/6am she woke with a sudden jolt and sat bolt upright. She looked around franticly. I recalled that she had just gotten out of Basic Training so I figured she was having the “oh shit I’m late and Sarge is going to kill me” panic. I reached over and lightly touched her arm and told her she was safe, not late and that it was ok to go back to sleep. She met my eyes and I saw an instant wave of relief and trust rush through them before she nodded and went back to sleep.

Almost from that moment forth she has been my best friend.

We have helped each other through relationships (establishing and ending), the crises of unemployments, the stresses of movings, and the headaches of the DMV.

She was there to help me through the sudden illness of my mother and the pain of her death shortly afterwards. She sat in that hospital ER with me and held my hand while I waited for the doctors to tell me any news at all. She came and gave me support to face family and friends and total strangers at the calling hours and memorial.

She has been my Zoo Bitch companion. She has been my clothes shopping partner who isn’t afraid to say “if you ever think of putting something like that on your body again I will break your arms”. She has been my caretaker when life has made it that I could not do so for myself. She was with me when we discovered the joy and rush of walking under a waterfall. She was my cat’s girlfriend. She is my cat’s Daddy. She is my puppy’s third momma.

She is my rock, my touch stone, my grounding force, my lightening rod, my magic mirror, my best friend, my confidant, my partner in all ways that matters.

She is my Boo.

And today, the 33rd anniversary of her birth, I give thanks to the universe for not only bringing her into this world, but for guiding us to each other.

Happy Birthday baby.

I love you.