baronessekat | 2014 writing challenge

O. Elwood was not particularly bright, but he was an earnest sort of fellow. When asked “what does the O stand for?” his response was always “I don’t know.” He just knew it was part of his name. As long as he could remember, whenever anyone said his name it was always said as “Oh, Elwood”. His mother, his teachers, the village priest, everyone called him “Oh Elwood”, and they always seemed to have a sad, exasperated tone when they said it.

Yes, he was a bit clumsy and he used to be easily distracted, but he always tried to do his very best. It just seemed that the tiny gods of the perverse and humor found him to be their favorite. If he was sent to fetch water from the well, the bucket would end up with a leak so that there was barely a drop left when he got home. If he was asked to collect the eggs from the coop, he would somehow find the only loose rock on the path and fall, breaking all but two. On his way to Holy Services, there could have been no rain for weeks, and yet, he’d managed to find the only mud puddle around and get his good clothes dirty. And every time, his mother would say “Oh, Elwood” as if that just explained it all.

But then came the day when the regional magistrate came to town to gather up new recruits for the local guard. All the young men of age stood in the square and listened for their name to be called. One after another of the others were called, until he heard a great sigh and the familiar name “Oh... Elwood”.

For him it was the proudest day of his life. Finally he had a vocation. He had a reason. He was to be a member of the guard. The others could be blacksmiths, and tailors and bakers. He was going to be important. After all, none of those other jobs got a fancy uniform. None of those others would be automatically given a bed to sleep in and food to eat. No, he got that all, just for being on the guard.

He may have had some difficulty during training. Left and right was a bit tricky. And his feet always seemed to get in the way during weapons training. But he tried and worked hard. His uniform was always perfect. The shine on his boots was better than even the Commander’s. He would always carefully make his bed for that perfect tight fit of blankets. His swords were never allowed to get a spot of rust. When it was his day to clean the floors of the barracks, you could eat off of them.

When there was free time, he went out to the yard and practiced. And slowly the pudge around his middle disappeared, his feet stopped getting in the way, though left and right continued to be a bit hard of a concept to grasp. Through the hard work and practice, he became the perfect grunt. He worked himself up the ranks and after more than a year of work, he got called into the Commander’s office. He was getting his own assignment.

There was a small shire not far from where he grew up that had a guard post that had become vacant. Mostly he would be responsible for nothing more than making sure the bridge over the ravine would be taken care of and collect the usage toll for it should anyone cross it. But it was a position.

And on that day, after lots of hard work, and attention to detail, he finally learned what the “O” stood for. He was to become “Officer Elwood”.

He walked out of the Commander’s office and started across the quad to pack his things. And, just as the Commander stepped out of the door behind him, promptly tripped on a stone and fell into a mud puddle, .

“Oh, Elwood.”

topic: Diligence