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SCA Post
Just before the world shut down, I had offered to a woman in my Kingdom the position of being my un-protege. She had a Peer who did not share officially but gave blessing for an informal relationship. She accepted.
The the world ended and life got hard for a LOT of people. Her included. Due to money issues, she ended up moving to another state and another kingdom.
In the last three weeks - as in the last two SCA events I have attended in person, I have been approached by several people to report disturbing behavior of the un-protege in regards to being basically a con-artist and taking large sums of money and not using it for the things it was to go towards (health care, rent, car payments, etc). These large sums were understood by the giver to be a loan, but then no indication of her trying to get a job to repay. Then she moved from the kingdom without any indication that a debt was owed (especially to those who believed they were helping her pay rent so she wouldn't get evicted - which she was).
These people who came to me indicated that they could not associate with/support people who would allow themselves to be connected to someone with such a history and reputation.
Now, if it were just me, I would be like this is all a miscommunication. If it had been one person, then I would say - bad blood here. But I have other students, other household members I have a responsibility to.
A former student, now Peer himself, had someone turn down a belt from him because they did not want to run the risk of running into her even on Facebook in comments.
So tonight I called her and we talked and I had to make the hard decision to rescind my offer to be her un-Peer and go so far as to say that in the SCA we need to break-up.
I encouraged her to seek out those who have given her money and see if there is a way to clear up communication and see who thinks she was loaned and what was gifted. Work to find a job where she lives now and seek restitution to those who feel she has wronged her.
It killed me to have to do it. But I swore oaths to protect those who are mine.
Being a grown-up and a Peer of the Realm sucks sometimes.
Just before the world shut down, I had offered to a woman in my Kingdom the position of being my un-protege. She had a Peer who did not share officially but gave blessing for an informal relationship. She accepted.
The the world ended and life got hard for a LOT of people. Her included. Due to money issues, she ended up moving to another state and another kingdom.
In the last three weeks - as in the last two SCA events I have attended in person, I have been approached by several people to report disturbing behavior of the un-protege in regards to being basically a con-artist and taking large sums of money and not using it for the things it was to go towards (health care, rent, car payments, etc). These large sums were understood by the giver to be a loan, but then no indication of her trying to get a job to repay. Then she moved from the kingdom without any indication that a debt was owed (especially to those who believed they were helping her pay rent so she wouldn't get evicted - which she was).
These people who came to me indicated that they could not associate with/support people who would allow themselves to be connected to someone with such a history and reputation.
Now, if it were just me, I would be like this is all a miscommunication. If it had been one person, then I would say - bad blood here. But I have other students, other household members I have a responsibility to.
A former student, now Peer himself, had someone turn down a belt from him because they did not want to run the risk of running into her even on Facebook in comments.
So tonight I called her and we talked and I had to make the hard decision to rescind my offer to be her un-Peer and go so far as to say that in the SCA we need to break-up.
I encouraged her to seek out those who have given her money and see if there is a way to clear up communication and see who thinks she was loaned and what was gifted. Work to find a job where she lives now and seek restitution to those who feel she has wronged her.
It killed me to have to do it. But I swore oaths to protect those who are mine.
Being a grown-up and a Peer of the Realm sucks sometimes.
(no subject)
Date: 2021-09-28 11:21 pm (UTC)Hopefully she can figure out how to clean up her reputation and get her life back on track.