A Glimpse into my mind

For almost 2 months I have been courting the kittens that were born under my back deck. My hair girl and her manager were interested in adopting any I could catch.

Things conspired against me for timing and this weekend was the first time I could comfortably put the trap out. I managed to catch sweet little Smudge last night. Texted B. and told her she and manager could come get today. I'd lend one of my carriers to them for transport and get it when I had my next appointment.

They come today and manager insists on transferring Smudge from my carrier to her's - outside. Yup... sweet little Smudge managed to squirm out of manager's grasp and ran right back into the backyard and under the deck.

*sigh* Trap is back out but I somehow suspect that there will be no second chances. Which is hard as, like I said, Smudge is a sweet girl. She did not hiss or spit at me, did not swipe at me and let me pet her while she was in quarantine in the guest bath.

Here's hoping I can get her caught again (and maybe some of her sibs) to get her out of the outdoor feral cycle.

Today I took my little girl to the vet for the bloodwork to see if the treatment for her FIP was a success.

Today at 2:08pm she was officially declared CURED!!!!!!!

6 days of injections. She’s gained almost 6 oz in weight AND her eyes are almost fully cleared.

It's still a LONG road: first is 84 days of injections...then hopefully her blood tests say she is in remission... then 90 days of observation... if she passes then she is considered cured. Ut because of her medical history she could relapse and we’d have to do this again

But she's being social (for her) - demanding snuggles and social grooming from Puck, she has been playing with the treat ball and her purr is back - not as strong as it was, but it's back (something I didn't realize had gone away until I heard it again).

So - cautiously optimistic.

I had been noticing that Lily Rose was looking like she was losing weight. But as she's not quite 3 I assumed it was a visual thing due to a growth spurt. I had also noticed her sounding like she was coughing up hairballs a lot.

Then last night I saw discoloration in both her eyes. So today I called the vet and got her in. The news is not good. She was diagnosed as Dry Type FIP. which is almost always terminal. There is a treatment that has not yet been officially approved in the US because just before it was going to, COvID-19 hit and FIP is a coronavirus. So they changed directions for human trials not feline.

It's possible to get the treatment but it's going to cost at least $3,000 USD and I'm out of work thanks to COVID-19.

I'm devastated. But a friend set up a go fund me to help me. We shall see.

https://www.gofundme.com/f/please-help-tina-ekat-save-lily

This weekend I went looking for a new little girl for the pride. No one came home with me but...

I put in an application with a rescue group for one of their little ones. She's a cute little 3 month old diluted calico (though to me she looks more like a diluted tortie). And she already has the name I had hoped to name the newest member of the Doma.

The website says I should hear in 3-5 days.

Hoping, but trying not to be too excited until I know for sure.

EDIT: I did not get her. But I have been preapproved for any of their cats. I just need to call when I see one I'm interested in.

This weekend I finally made myself do some thinking in regards to my little girl. She's still really snuggly, even if that means she drools all over you. She's vocally demanding of her baby food (though she won't stand up for herself when Puck pushes his way in, which causes me to have to stand over feeding time).

But I see the writing on the walls. She's getting skinnier, despite all the baby food she eats. She drool is almost constant. She's worn away a bit of fur on her chin from the constant grooming due to the drooling. And her breath, which was never that good, is getting worse.

I have given myself two different Saturdays to say goodbye. It will either be April 7th or May 5th. I honestly will be surprised if she makes it to May, but that is the latest. April would make it 5 months since diagnosis. May would be 6 months.

I feel like a bad kitty Momma when I say that I have a final day for her 2 months into the future. But I have to be realistic. April 21st I step up as Voice of the Crown Herald. That is a job with a LOT of weekend traveling. I just cannot see asking friends and neighbors to come in on weekends, several times a day to feed my sick and dying cat. April 28th weekend is Blackstone Raids, and Julie and Patrick have said they would be happy to go spend time with her and feed her while I"m gone for the 3 day weekend. But after that...

May 5th I"m home. Then after that is crown weekend (another leave after work on Friday and not get home until sometime Sunday) and then War Practice (leaving Friday morning and not coming back until late Sunday - and all my SCAdian options for pet care are going to be at the event.)

I have to be practical. If she even makes it through March and April, I cannot do it to her or my people circle. I can wish all I want that this was not happening, but it is and I have to do what is right by her and by me.

my heart is heavy.

When I returned from Thanksgiving I noticed something wasn't right with my Talia Boo. So today I took her to the vet and was confirmed with what I suspected.

The Supreme Dowager Empress Talia Christine Ekaterinova has cancer. It's bone cancer in her jaw. Given her age (she's 13) and incredibly sensitive system, I have opted to not bother taking her to the veterinary dentist for the potential of having her lower jaw removed. Instead I have brought her home to enjoy what she has left with her family. The vet has said he suspects a couple months instead of weeks, but as all things with cancer, you never know. Unlike my beloved Nicodemus who had a fibroid sarcoma, she cannot be treated with steroids.

Right now she eats, uses the box as she should and is very demanding of snuggles (she even demanded snuggles from Doctor Dave). So it's just let nature take it's course and know that she will tell me when it's time to say goodbye.

* all materials for Pelican scroll arrived.

* word that my new sunglasses and TARDIS jersey have shipped and should arrive soon.

* never-ending pile on desk downgraded to "no so intimidating" status instead of "OMG how will it ever get done" status

* New family member. Nimbus Alexander Ekaterinavich is a 2 year old, Long Hair Russian Blue mix. (I suspect he is also part Ragdoll as he goes boneless when I pick him up)



* Went and taught at the College of 3 Ravens. I fully expected to yet again have no students for my "Who do I fight next" class as has happened the last two times I've tried to teach it formally. Instead I had 8 students. It went very well and all were engaged and open. (Though if we all get sick we know which student gave us the crud as she showed up sniffling and sneezing and coughing).

*The paint a blank table at 3 ravens was well received as well.

For those who have read/listened to Jenny Lawson's "Let's Pretend This Never Happened" and have gotten to the story about being attacked by a serial killer in her sleep will know exactly what I mean when I say "I was attacked by a serial killer last night"

Only, like her, the serial killer was Fat-Ass (aka Puck the Cat) trying to jump over my head to get from one side of the pillows to the other and landed on me and scratched a roughly 3 inch scratch into my scalp at 2:48am (well that was the time when I was coherent enough to put my glasses on and look at the time). And like all scalp wounds it bled like a Mo Fo and it took me a good 20 minutes of pressure to get the thing to stop bleeding so I could contemplate going back to sleep.

Doing my hair this morning was an exercise in "ow, ow, G.D. Cat, ow, ow, ow"

My ass is not a scratching post.

I don't care how tempting it is when I stand at the ironing board.